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Post by Quantumly on Sept 21, 2023 20:15:47 GMT -5
Quote: “Two years ago it was impossible to get through on the phone to the IRS. Now it's just hard to get through. That's progress.” -Charles Rossotti, former IRS Commissioner
Disappointed that you never had time to write the great American novel? Don’t fret, just go dig out your past tax returns.
Quote: "The Eiffel Tower is the Empire State Building after taxes."
Under the Freedom of Information Act, a man with a small business sent a request to the IRS asking if they had a file on him. The IRS wrote back, “There is now.”
Quote: “It would be nice if we could all pay our taxes with a smile, but normally cash is required.”
Quote: “Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite as satisfying as an income tax refund.”
Q: How do you drive a CPA insane?
A: Fill out Form 1040EZ.
Quote: “The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect."
[li]Why is it that when the IRS loses a tax return, it is considered a mistake, but when you lose a receipt, it is considered tax evasion?
Quote: "The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling."
Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth?
A: Have them fill out a tax return.
Q: Why is a tax audit like a tornado?
A: There's a lot of screaming and you end up losing your house.
Quote: “When are we going to be allowed to list the government as a dependent?”
People often say death and taxes are the same, but this is wrong. Death is a taxable event, but taxes never die.
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